Are You an Orange Barrel?


     Driving around Omaha you can't help but notice the plethora of
orange-colored barrels delineating the numerous road construction and
destruction sites. Suddenly, four lanes of traffic are funneled into three,
then two, then sometimes even into only one lane. This is great fun,
especially during rush hour as hundreds of conveyances wiggle and waggle
into a semblance of uniformity to navigate around those orange barrels.

     Especially aggravating is when those dreaded orange barrels are not
accompanied by workers toiling at their appointed tasks. Even worse are
barrels barricading one or more lanes and there is no evidence of any work
having been done in the past and the future, as far as street repair being
performed, is doubtful. Why place those barrels as an impediment to progress
unless they are actually needed? I may have found the reason why. The
engineers running the street repair show are UNO graduates!!! Yes.
illustrious alumni of our wondrous institute of quasi-higher education. Why
do I think this? Well..

     Departing the room at the end of class I inch forward towards the door.
Wondering what the heck is taking so long to depart the constricting
confines I continue to inch along. Suddenly, I am free!!! I'm out the
door!!! Hooray. But.. I find myself having to sidestep the objects that were
restricting the orderly timely flow of exiting student bodies. Smack dab in
front of the door, directly in the middle of the hallway is three students
firmly planted to the floor discussing the meaning of life, or what they're
gonna' do Friday night or sumpthin' of equal Earth-shattering importance. I
notice the herd of humans having to queue up to skirt their way around the
oblivious human orange barrels impeding progress.

     Are you an orange barrel? Are you so unaware of your effect upon the
flow of folks that you continue to occupy what is at that moment the most
vital piece of real estate in the entire building? Has the abstract concept
of "common courtesy" ever entered your mind? I doubt it. How simple it would
be to plant your carcass elsewhere other than directly in the doorway of
departing students. It would be simplicity in itself to sidestep away from
the doorway and out of the center of the hall and gently impact the wall. In
other words.. get the heck outta' the way!!!
An adage used by the United States Marine Corps seems to fit this scenario,
"Either lead, follow, or get the heck out of the way!!!" Makes sense to me.
And, I sure ain't gonna' argue with a bunch of Marines!!!.

     So... don't be an orange barrel acting as an impediment to the flow of
life. Move yer' body. Clear a path. And, after you graduate, see whatcha'
can do about the real orange barrels should you go to work for the city.

     Carry On.

Ob Bop
National Master-at-Arms
Student Revolutionary Strike Force